I am nearly mad, I think. And when I say "mad," I mean that in the "insane" way. The last two weeks have driven me to the brink. I had a complete emotional breakdown, beginning on Thursday night. My poor mother...she has been great to help me. The stress of everything finally got to me. But, hey...I think I did pretty good, considering that this has been building intensely for five years and slowly for 20. I will be fine, but I when I started crying on Thursday night it was really hard to stop...and I didn't, for the most part. I just took breaks.
So, I am working today and tomorrow, and then I am taking three glorious days off. I have been asked not to do anything...and I am going to try to comply with that. At least, I will not do anything work or dissertation related. I desperately need to get some new clothing, though. Ah. Good times. (Lots of sarcasm here. I hate to shop.)
Anyway, you may not hear from me much...and, then again, you might. It just depends on my mood. This is an unusually rough time in my life. I don't like asking for help from coworkers/friends or taking a break from my work, because it makes me feel useless and weak. I mean, people have gone through much harder things. Every time I start feeling bad, I try to remind myself of the real tragedies in the world or in the past. It helps a little.